nothing exciting to write about

I have not done much fibre work recently. There is so much left from the Origin time, that I feel guilty to produce more. And I haven't heard from the gallery back, who wanted to represent my work, I guess that was just a joke and they changed their mind. That is weird here in New Zealand, people don't tell you what they really think. Everything has to be polite and so as a German you believe what they tell you not realizing that they just didn't want to say they don't like your work. And as a German you can upset Kiwis very quickly by speaking out what you think.
Somehow I lost my energy, its quite depressing to sit here in the middle of all that things  I have done, which nobody wants anymore and I guess they will end up to be prezzies for the family for the rest of my life, and they will get sick of it.
In town has opened a new shop 'Feltings and Treasures', I was stunned to see that and I wonder how can she afford the high rent in such a prominent position! It is a lady new to Kerikeri and she sells only her own work. I must admit - I think I have seen better work and I am not talking about my own work, I wouldn't go this far. But here in the region are at least 3 other felters who definitely produce much better work.
I am looking forward to our trip to Germany in the hope to see one or two markets with some feltwork. The felter scene is so exciting in Europe and the variety of material one can get is incredible!. In this sense we are a 3rd world country here. It is hard to find things, one has to order from far away or use kiwi ingenuitiy to compromise. And it is also not really a place to sell things, mainly only tourist buy something, most locals either don't have any money or are not interested in wooly things, probably both. Would be great to catch up with some felters to see their work, to get a bit of motivation back just to do things for myself, for my own joy, thats the best anyway. Not to think what would somebody else like but what do I like! And what do I want to do! Just for the sake of my own happiness.
And doing creative things makes happy! I am missing this happiness and hopefully I will get it back.